Managing jealousy

Greeting everyone. Here I am again. Sitting infront of my computer. Just to improve my writing skills. Hahaha! Well, yeah. Hrrmm... Can't really sleep yet. Probably later, not so soon. But I will try forcing myself off to bed once I'm done with this. Hopefully!

So people, mind if I ask, is green your colour? When the green-eyed monster (jealousy) strikes, there is no telling what u are capable of doing to the person u are envious of.

Why do we get jealous? Is it a good thing? Can we successfully use our our jealous streak to strive to be better and in the process, work harder to get whatever we want?

I've read an article from a magazine. Experts say that professional jealousy comes with the profession ... any profession. The basic problem we face with professional jealousy is the extent to which it affects our psyche and the influence it has on others.

Normal jealously is acceptable. It is OK for u to feel envious about your peer’s success or promotion and how well she has done if you can say, “I am happy she’s made it. I hope it's my turn the next time.” This is healthy and it may just spur you on to greater things.

I looked up the definition of “jealous” and I found the word “envious” along with it. The definition was “feeling bitter and unhappy because of another’s advantages, possessions or luck.”

Look at all the negative emotions that come into play. Being jealous makes u unhappy. It makes u bitter, miserable and irrational. Sad isn't it? Hrrmm...

Professional jealousy is common in the workplace. It may happen in the best of environments, where people have planned career paths and yet many get waylaid, without the opportunity to go up the ladder. When people get left behind, what reactions do we see? U could even be jealous of your best friend’s success. It does not matter where u work. U could be a smart, hardworking executive who is liked by the boss but are not popular with the rest of your peers.

Or u could be an excellent leader, with the vision and ideas on how to get things done but you find people sabotaging your efforts. Or u could be a dedicated doctor who cares for the patient’s well-being, yet your colleagues seldom refer cases to u for fear that your dedication would reflect on their attitude.

Oh, and I love this sentence... Can professional jealousy be managed? The answers.. In mature corporate organisations, leaders of teams will tell u that it is possible. Yup! ... The remedy basically is that we should have “self-discipline,” pursue a high ideal in life and be devoted to the profession for its own sake.

When everyone is working for corporate success and some of us are not so lucky, how do we get over the envy we feel and move on to bettering ourselves? Here are some steps to manage professional jealousy:

Do not be nasty about someone’s success. Do not say anything negative in public as what u say has a way of going back to the person involved.

If u really think that someone’s promotion was unfair and u were bypassed, write down your grievances in your diary and keep it under lock and key. If u want to scream your frustrations out loud, go to a beach and do so, but see that there is no one there. Hehehe! Hey! Serious.. It's true. U people should try this out. Shout as hard as u can.

Learn to deal with your frustrations quietly and move on. Focus on where u went wrong so that u can rectify it. *FOCUS ZALINA FOCUS*

Do recognise jealousy. If u feel “bad, angry, depressed, bitter, bitchy” u are jealous.

Once u understand your feelings, face facts. This is a “normal” feeling. You are only human. U are disappointed. Go talk to someone who is your best friend and who will not be judgmental or talk about u behind your back. If there is no one, talk to yourself. Talk to the mirror. Rant and rave. Then get over it and move on. U have better things to do. All this should not take more than one day.

Think about the person who got the promotion. What did she/he do right? Did she/he work hard, how did she/he manage the relationship with the boss? Did she/he deserve what she/he got? But if the means to the end was not ethical, decide how u want to play the game. If there was discrimination and favouritism, then there is nothing u can do about it; your only option is to switch jobs.

It is a pity not many people take heed of the negative elements of professional jealousy. What is tragic is that experienced professionals tend to be jealous of young people who are smart and dynamic.

They are quick to destroy the careers of these young people by not giving them the right opportunities. Professional jealousy has many drawbacks. It makes u miserable, your friends leave u, time is wasted and there is enough bile to poison your life for good.

*Be positive ... Think positive ... Act positively* - must remind myself of that.

Any words that is suitable for 'positive'? Mind sharing the idea with me?